When you became parents, your whole world changed in an instant. Your priorities shifted to this tiny new human who needs you for their every need. And your needs? Well, they often take a backseat.

Once date nights transform into Netflix on the couch, it’s easy to feel disconnected from your spouse. You’re touched out from holding a baby all day. You’re exhausted managing home and work and doctor’s appointments along with play dates, school deadlines and we haven’t even tackled errands and chores. At some point, you realize you’ve gone days or weeks barely having a real conversation.

Reality check: your kids need parents who have a solid, loving relationship. You can’t be there fully for your kids unless you are also showing up for your partnership. Making time for your marriage is vital, yet so easily overlooked when drowning in parenting duties.

Carving out couple-time might sound laughable when you’re in busy mom or dad mode but with a little creativity, commitment and planning, you absolutely can keep date night from getting canceled indefinitely!

Get Creative with At-Home Dates
Get the kids to bed a half hour early and enjoy dinner by candlelight after they go down. Make time for a weekend breakfast date while kids watch cartoons. Retreat to the porch with wine and dessert after kids are in bed for uninterrupted conversation under the stars. Plan an indoor picnic when getting out of the house proves too hard. The key is stealing small moments just for the two of you.

Plan Regular Night Out Babysitting
Whether monthly or biweekly, put respite child care on the calendar so you always know it’s coming. Even if finances are tight, make sitter time a priority in your budget. Some parents trade nights with other families. The point is to commit to a steady standing date – on the calendar!

Set Tech Boundaries
Many couples get pulled into screen time versus meaningful time together. Make rules like no phones during meals, at least 30 minutes of talk time before bed, and putting phones away after kid bedtime. Protect your precious moments sans distractions.

As parents it’s infinitely easier to put your kids and their demands first out of sheer necessity. But pour into each other daily in small ways, carve out regular couple time, and commit to focusing on “us”. Because ultimately a marriage that thrives benefits everyone.